Collaborative Agreement

The collaborative divorce process begins with both parties agreeing to some basic ground rules — signing a collaborative agreement or participation agreement.

The parties agree to:

• Negotiate a mutually agreeable agreement without going to court. In Nebraska, a judge will sign off on the agreement, but the spouses will decide on all issues related to the divorce.

• The parties agree to start over completely if either party decides to go to court. If a settlement cannot be reached, the lawyers will withdraw from the process and new counsel will have to be retained for the ensuing litigation. The idea of starting all over again can be a powerful financial deterrent from quitting the collaborative process.

• The spouses agree to communicate openly and share information in good faith, with total transparency. If you can’t bear to be in the same room as your spouse, collaborative divorce probably isn’t for you, because many issues will be handled in group sessions known as four-ways (in which both attorneys and both divorce coaches are present with the spouses), or five-ways — meetings which also include the shared financial specialist or shared child specialist. The parties agree that communications during the process will be “fair” — and they will not take advantage of errors made by the other party. There is no “discovery” process in collaborative divorce — any information required to facilitate the divorce must be shared voluntary by the parties.

• Lastly, the collaborative agreement states that the parties will work together to create shared solutions. They don’t have to agree on everything initially, but they must agree to work to manage their emotions and reach an agreement together.